How to Trust Yourself as a New Mom When You Feel Unsure
Many postpartum moms worry about the same thing:
“I don’t think I have intuition.”
Or:
“Everyone talks about maternal instincts, but I feel unsure all the time.”
If that sounds familiar, here’s the most important thing to know first: Your intuition hasn’t disappeared. In fact, it’s stronger than ever. Even if it feels like you don’t have any.
Why Intuition Feels So Quiet Postpartum
Postpartum is a perfect storm for disconnecting from yourself.
You’re likely dealing with:
sleep deprivation
hormonal shifts
constant decision-making
advice from every direction
pressure to do things “right”
Intuition needs space, safety, and permission. So, when your nervous system is overloaded, your internal signals feel like they are drowned out.
Intuition Isn’t a Feeling of Certainty
One common myth is that intuition feels calm, confident, and crystal clear.
For many moms, intuition actually shows up as:
a tug in your stomach
irritation when advice doesn’t fit
relief when you choose a certain path
a sense that something is “off,” even if you can’t explain why
Intuition feels different when you become a parent. It’s stronger than you’re used to, or can manifest in completely different ways. This can make listening to it harder because you may not even recognize it!
Why New Moms Stop Trusting Themselves
Postpartum culture unintentionally teaches moms to outsource trust.
Schedules, trackers, guidelines, and expert opinions can be helpful but can also send the message that someone else knows better than you do.
Over time, this can lead to:
second-guessing every decision
checking external sources before checking in with yourself
feeling anxious even when things are going “fine”
Ultimately, there’s too much noise out there and it isn’t all helpful. The very things that were created to help can actually have the opposite effect. Sometimes, you just need the space to listen to yourself.
Ways to Reconnect With Your Intuition
These are ways we have found to reconnect with your intuition, but please, only take what feels right to you. Ultimately, you will know best for how to reconnect with yourself, and if anything we invite you to try feels wrong for where you’re at, trust that feeling.
These are all small ways to start letting your intuition guide you again..
1. Reduce the Noise
You don’t have to go on a phone detox or ban social media from your life forever. However, it can really be helpful to slow it down at times. .
Try:
limiting how many voices you consult
pausing before Googling
noticing how advice feels in your body
Even things like funny reels and innocent scrolling on Pinterest or Threads can be a way that you’re absorbing advice, sometimes without even realizing it. Pay attention to how you feel when you’re looking at things. Tension usually means “not for me.” Relief usually means “this fits.”
2. Notice What Already Works
Intuition often shows up in what you’re already doing instinctively.
Ask yourself:
What calms my baby fastest?
What makes me feel more regulated?
What routines feel sustainable — not perfect, just doable?
You’re already making intuitive decisions every day.
3. Let Yourself Experiment
Trust grows through experience, not rules.
Instead of asking:
“Is this the right thing?”
Try asking:
“What happens if I try this?”
You’re allowed to adjust and change your mind. We’d be surprised if you didn’t. No routine or schedule lasts forever, just like no phase lasts forever.
4. Pay Attention to Your Emotional Reactions
Your emotions are information.
Resentment often signals unmet needs
Anxiety often signals overload
Relief often signals alignment
None of these are bad, although they can certainly feel bad. Instead, take them as feedback.
You Don’t Need the “Perfect Intuition”
Some of the most reassuring ideas in child development suggest that parents don’t need to be perfect or endlessly instructed.
They need to be good enough. That simply means a parent needs to be responsive, present, and themselves.
Your intuition strengthens when:
you’re not constantly corrected
you’re supported, not judged
you’re allowed to learn as you go
When It Helps to Have Support
Sometimes intuition feels blocked not because you’re doing anything wrong, but because you’re overwhelmed or alone.
Having someone who:
listens without fixing
reflects instead of advises
trusts you
can make it easier to hear yourself again.
Support doesn’t replace intuition, but it can help bring it back.
A Final Reminder
If you feel disconnected from your intuition postpartum, it doesn’t mean you don’t have it. It means it may look different now that you’ve been through a major transition. Trust in yourself is a lot like motherhood… it grows slowly, quietly, and imperfectly.
FAQ
Do moms really have intuition?
Yes. Intuition is built through attunement and experience, not instant certainty.
Why do I feel unsure as a new mom?
Uncertainty is common postpartum due to sleep deprivation, hormonal shifts, and external pressure. It’s not a lack of instinct.
How can I trust myself more as a parent?
Reduce advice overload, notice what already works, and allow yourself to experiment without judgment.
Does needing support mean I lack intuition?
No. Support often helps restore intuition by reducing overwhelm and self-doubt.